J and I were back in London by Monday afternoon, and I started packing as soon as we got back since I was flying to Beijing the next day. Let me tell you, it's not easy packing three weeks worth of stuff, especially when you're going to different temperature extremes: Beijing - average, Tibet - ass cold, Nepal - swamp butt hot. But I somehow managed to squeeze it all in my new backpack.
My British Airways flight to Beijing pretty much sucked. The TV was broken, the overhead light was stuck in the on position and my window shutter wouldn't close. The only good thing about it was that the flight was relatively empty, which meant I got three seats all to myself.
I arrived before any of my friends and managed to get a good nap in before they finally showed up three hours behind schedule. One of them had a knife stashed in his luggage (I still don't know why) and they weren't able to travel on the metro since you have to undergo a security check every time you get on the metro and such items are prohibited. They also had a hard time finding a taxi since Beijing cabs won't take you if they don't "feel" like it.
We were all famished at that point, and we headed off to Ghost Street, which is well-known for late night dining.
We wandered into a restaurant that looked like it was doing a brisk business and ordered dinner by pointing at various things on the menu. The food that finally came out was disgusting - there was more gristle and bone than meat and everything was positively swimming in grease. Smoking is permitted pretty much everywhere in Beijing, including inside restaurants, and the smell of nicotine didn't make the food taste any better. We finally gave up trying to eat and settled for watching the guys next to us attacking their stewed bullfrogs with gusto.
The next day, we hopped on the metro to check out Tiananmen Square and the Forbidden City. I have to hand it to Beijing, their metro kicks the Tube's ass. It's dirt cheap, clean and air-conditioned.
Tiananmen Square was a vast expanse of concrete interspersed with splashes of Communist red. Several buildings enclosed the square and two giant TV screens were showing what looked like propaganda.
There was a very strong military presence, with lots of soldiers in formal uniforms standing around with ramrod straight posture.
Mao's mausoleum is also located there, but none of us were curious enough to try to catch a glimpse of his casket. We settled for his portrait, which made him look like a kindly grandfather. Ha!
My general impression of the square was that it was stark, forbidding and the least friendliest place ever. They've even got a sculpture that looks like it wants to shoot you! Btw, none of the people in their sculptures look remotely Chinese - what's up with that?
There really wasn't that much to look at so we headed to the Forbidden City. More soldiers dotted the landscape, and I finally got yelled at for taking their picture. I wasn't that keen on getting arrested in China so I stopped snapping pics and cannot provide photographic evidence of some of the guys who were standing in formation with the soldiers. They were strangely dressed in street clothes and looked like disgusting slobs - one guy had his finger shoved so far up his nose that it looked like he was conducting a full-on excavation of his piddly brain. Now I ask you, would Mao approve? I think not.
The compound was huge, much bigger than we originally imagined, and although the buildings were impressive enough, they all start to look alike after a while.
I found the statues to be much more interesting. A killer dog with a killer 'fro was my favourite.
Many of China's buildings are guarded by a pair of lions - one female and one male. You can tell them apart because the male has a ball under his paw while the female has a cub under hers.
Dragons can also be found pretty much everywhere. I don't know why this one looks like he's laughing hysterically - there's nothing fun or funny about the Forbidden City. Oh, except for the shop that allows you to put on traditional clothing and puts you against a green screen to produce a video that makes you look like you're flying through the Forbidden City.
It was a hard five hour slog, but we got through it in the end. After a short break back at the hotel, we headed out to Wangfujing, a large outdoor shopping area with a wide variety of retail outlets.
It's also home to a street famous for its cheap and freakish eats. We hit up the food stalls and sampled some dumplings, noodles and pumpkin cakes.
Some of the stuff that we didn't sample included...
Dog stew:
Giant centipedes:
King spiders:
We were still pretty hungry since we weren't that keen on filling our bellies with sheep penis and baby shark, and we were tired of fighting with street vendors who conveniently "forgot" to return our change or straight up demanded more money after agreeing on a price. In defeat, we found refuge at the nearest McDonald's to get away from all the salty and greasy food. Ironic, huh?
Some other things I hated about Beijing:
(1) People spitting all the time. ALL THE TIME.
(2) People smoking everywhere.
(3) The worst pollution I've ever encountered in my life, and I'm from LA!
(4) The never-ending hostile stares.
(5) The strange lack of fruit and vegetables.
(6) Why does everything need to be deep-fried?
(7) The constant jostling and pushing. I WILL elbow you back, asshole.
(8) The aggressive driving. Here's a thought: try to not run over pedestrians.
(9) Censorship. I couldn't access any blogs, and I was advised that if I type any "troubling" words in my emails such as "Tibet" or "freedom", my email would most likely shut down. Fan-f*cking-tastic.
I needed to get out of there...
My British Airways flight to Beijing pretty much sucked. The TV was broken, the overhead light was stuck in the on position and my window shutter wouldn't close. The only good thing about it was that the flight was relatively empty, which meant I got three seats all to myself.
I arrived before any of my friends and managed to get a good nap in before they finally showed up three hours behind schedule. One of them had a knife stashed in his luggage (I still don't know why) and they weren't able to travel on the metro since you have to undergo a security check every time you get on the metro and such items are prohibited. They also had a hard time finding a taxi since Beijing cabs won't take you if they don't "feel" like it.
We were all famished at that point, and we headed off to Ghost Street, which is well-known for late night dining.
We wandered into a restaurant that looked like it was doing a brisk business and ordered dinner by pointing at various things on the menu. The food that finally came out was disgusting - there was more gristle and bone than meat and everything was positively swimming in grease. Smoking is permitted pretty much everywhere in Beijing, including inside restaurants, and the smell of nicotine didn't make the food taste any better. We finally gave up trying to eat and settled for watching the guys next to us attacking their stewed bullfrogs with gusto.
The next day, we hopped on the metro to check out Tiananmen Square and the Forbidden City. I have to hand it to Beijing, their metro kicks the Tube's ass. It's dirt cheap, clean and air-conditioned.
Tiananmen Square was a vast expanse of concrete interspersed with splashes of Communist red. Several buildings enclosed the square and two giant TV screens were showing what looked like propaganda.
There was a very strong military presence, with lots of soldiers in formal uniforms standing around with ramrod straight posture.
Mao's mausoleum is also located there, but none of us were curious enough to try to catch a glimpse of his casket. We settled for his portrait, which made him look like a kindly grandfather. Ha!
My general impression of the square was that it was stark, forbidding and the least friendliest place ever. They've even got a sculpture that looks like it wants to shoot you! Btw, none of the people in their sculptures look remotely Chinese - what's up with that?
There really wasn't that much to look at so we headed to the Forbidden City. More soldiers dotted the landscape, and I finally got yelled at for taking their picture. I wasn't that keen on getting arrested in China so I stopped snapping pics and cannot provide photographic evidence of some of the guys who were standing in formation with the soldiers. They were strangely dressed in street clothes and looked like disgusting slobs - one guy had his finger shoved so far up his nose that it looked like he was conducting a full-on excavation of his piddly brain. Now I ask you, would Mao approve? I think not.
The compound was huge, much bigger than we originally imagined, and although the buildings were impressive enough, they all start to look alike after a while.
I found the statues to be much more interesting. A killer dog with a killer 'fro was my favourite.
Many of China's buildings are guarded by a pair of lions - one female and one male. You can tell them apart because the male has a ball under his paw while the female has a cub under hers.
Dragons can also be found pretty much everywhere. I don't know why this one looks like he's laughing hysterically - there's nothing fun or funny about the Forbidden City. Oh, except for the shop that allows you to put on traditional clothing and puts you against a green screen to produce a video that makes you look like you're flying through the Forbidden City.
It was a hard five hour slog, but we got through it in the end. After a short break back at the hotel, we headed out to Wangfujing, a large outdoor shopping area with a wide variety of retail outlets.
It's also home to a street famous for its cheap and freakish eats. We hit up the food stalls and sampled some dumplings, noodles and pumpkin cakes.
Some of the stuff that we didn't sample included...
Dog stew:
Giant centipedes:
King spiders:
We were still pretty hungry since we weren't that keen on filling our bellies with sheep penis and baby shark, and we were tired of fighting with street vendors who conveniently "forgot" to return our change or straight up demanded more money after agreeing on a price. In defeat, we found refuge at the nearest McDonald's to get away from all the salty and greasy food. Ironic, huh?
Some other things I hated about Beijing:
(1) People spitting all the time. ALL THE TIME.
(2) People smoking everywhere.
(3) The worst pollution I've ever encountered in my life, and I'm from LA!
(4) The never-ending hostile stares.
(5) The strange lack of fruit and vegetables.
(6) Why does everything need to be deep-fried?
(7) The constant jostling and pushing. I WILL elbow you back, asshole.
(8) The aggressive driving. Here's a thought: try to not run over pedestrians.
(9) Censorship. I couldn't access any blogs, and I was advised that if I type any "troubling" words in my emails such as "Tibet" or "freedom", my email would most likely shut down. Fan-f*cking-tastic.
I needed to get out of there...
